Page 113 - Dark Matter:Women Witnessing Issue2
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diagnosis, I became aware of a heightened level of instruction from my dreams. Most of the time the
dreams were epic and yet when I awoke I could recall them in exquisite detail—writing their images
down for pages. Although there has been an ebb and flow to my remembering them, my gratitude for
dreams like the one above, is profound.
Before my mastectomy in 2001, in between the first diagnosis of cancer in 1996 and the second in
2001, I had dreams so powerful that they’d wake me up. I’d scream aloud and be crying or shaking. In
one dream, there were only words of instruction: “Learn everything you can before you die.”
Sometimes I had dreams that were complete but were only sensations. In one, I felt someone—some
spirit—breathing over me. In another, a presence spooned behind me in my bed beneath the covers.
More than once, I awoke to the sight of a dark, footless spirit hovering menacingly by the side of my
bed. I began to pay attention.
This dream that came to me the night after another September 11 anniversary symbolizes both
present-‐day and ancestral trauma that I believe is universal.
When September 11, 2001 occurred, when the Trade Towers were bombed in New York, I was halfway
through an eleven-‐month course of chemotherapy for a recurrence of breast cancer. I was doing my
best to recover from the mastectomy. I was in Zimbabwe, having traveled there five months after the
mastectomy to undergo initiation with an indigenous healer and six other individuals. On September
11, at 3:30PM, I was circumambulating the fertility tower in the 13C ruins of the Shona Empire in
Greater Zimbabwe. At the exact moment when the plane hit the first Tower in New York, 8,000 miles
away, I had the following visions:
In the first, I saw blood and pillaging. People were running with calfskins on their bodies and spears in
their arms. Men’s dark, naked bodies were covered in blood from being impaled by spears. They were
decapitated. Innocent women and children were also victimized and desecrated.
When the second tower was bombed, I saw a woman suspended in the dark heavens, giving birth to a
new Earth. She struggled to push the Earth out from between her legs with such anguish that her cries
filled the cosmos and reverberated in a way no spirit, being, or galaxy could ignore. All energy, beings,
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